Three Years, Two Babies, and One Dressage Test Later

It had been three years since I last rode down a centre line.
Three years, two more children, and one very different version of me.

When I last competed in September 2022, Paige was nine months old, and it was the Dressage National Championships. Fast forward to last weekend, and there we were - back in the arena after a long, unplanned pause. Not with the same preparation, not with the same routine, but with something I didn’t know I’d been missing… ease.

I didn’t tell many people I was competing. Not because I didn’t want to share it, but because I didn’t want to commit to something that, in reality, could have changed in an instant. I’ve learned that plans with children (and horses!) are best made in pencil. The idea of being able to change my mind without the weight of expectation felt oddly freeing.
And that’s not me. Not usually.

Normally, I’d be test riding for days beforehand, but this time, I just rode the day before and got on with it.

I hadn't put much thought into the fact that if I hadn't been out of the yard, neither had Hallie. She was chatty when we got there, but so well behaved. She was unsettled by the shift from outdoor to indoor (understandably so!) and found the foliage very suspicious, so the canter around the arena that we would have typically prepared with became a muddled trot-walk-trot.

But in that moment, instead of frustration, I felt something I didn’t expect - gratitude. Gratitude for being there at all. For having a horse like Hallie. For the team around me that makes this even possible.

Emma was there, as always — my right-hand woman and Hallie’s other rider was there too, someone who has quietly kept her ticking over when I couldn’t. My kids, my parents and even my niece & nephews - my whole little team, literally cheering on the sidelines. It wasn't a big event, but it was quietly monumental.

This day wasn’t about the score.
It was about getting there.

I’m acutely aware of the privilege that surrounds me; to have help, support, a horse like Hallie. But I take none of it for granted. In fact, that awareness has softened me. It’s shifted my perspective from pressure to presence.

I was no longer driven by perfection or performance, but by curiosity - Could we do it again? Could I still feel that connection, that spark? Did I still love the competition side of horses?
Well, we could - and I do.

Were they our best tests? No, but they were the most meaningful ones I’ve ridden in years. And, two respectable 68+% with some lovely comments and a couple of red rosettes, were a lovely bonus to come away with. I can't wait to do it all again!

I wanted to share this as a little proof that while it might take a village, a plan B, and a bit of flexibility, it is possible for equestrian mums to find their way back to the arena.

Stay Sound,
Sarah x